Why do you ride fixed gear? Is it out of bitterness (i.e. ABSSS), you know bomb the system. Or maybe it is to avoid falling into the trap of the sausage syndrome.

Ah, yes, we all know at least one fat middle age guy who after years of inactivity has an epiphany and decides his way to cycling glory and fame is not by riding, but by building an exact Lance Armstrong replicate bike. (BTW, I have no idea which stem did Lance use in the 6th stage of his 5th tour win.) The guy who for all his effort to get the coolest bike just ends up looking like a little stuffed sausage wrapped in spandex.

Everyone has this guy in their town and your heart can't help but go out to him. You feel the pains of sympathy every-time you see him throw one of his little sausage legs over the $6,000 rig. The rig which is so blatantly a substitute for his lack of manhood, that cruel fate saw fit to endow, or not endow him with, as the case may be.

Your heart goes out every bloody time because you are a sucker for such things. It pains you to see that everyone in the world, but him, realizes he just shouldn't be wearing spandex. As cruel as it is, the far too tight team postal replicate jersey and shorts where designed for people who, on a daily basis, actually ride farther than to the corner store for yet one more cool icy treat.

Yes, indeed the world is cruel. So what do you do?

Well, after a hard afternoon of drinking you realize these facts and in a half drunken stupor you jump to your feet and exclaim, "Screw fate... homie don't play that shit!" Then, since money will solve all modern aliments, you whip out the VISA and enter into a bold new world. You buy that courier bag, build a track/fixed gear road bike and get on out into world.

Well, now you can rejoice in the fact you have just officially been declared urban cool...

How do I know this? Well my fine gear hating friends, all life's important information can be obtained from the mass media and as it happens there have been two fairly recent articles declaring that we rule, and everyone should strive to be just like us.

Article 1: KAUT News - http://www.katu.com/news/3619486.html (also attached below)

http://www.katu.com/news/3619486.html

Article 2: Wired News : - http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/2005/04/67149 (also attached below)

I say say Viva La Revolution. Bikes are a revelation and fixies are the revolution.

You see these bikes are of the people and for the people. Mine for example is worth nothing. It is, through and through, a ghetto fixie and I love it all the more. I stole the frame out a buddy's trash and my only cost was building a rear wheel. And if you don't believe just how low I stoop well then ask him yourself.

The revolution is zen, its riding to ride. No high tech gadgetry, no reverse rise detailers, no 10 gear clusters or nutty VPP suspension invented by the same aliens that built the pyramids and brought you TiVo. Its the zen of the burn, and the drink of celebration. Beer is the medium of this religion.

So does it matter that fixie riding is becoming trendy? Won't it destroy everything?

As I see it no. Make no mistake, the culture eating yuppies will get it all wrong and dilute what we are. But fear not, because they will inevitably make the mistake of throwing too much money at the process. They will have to out do all the other yuppies by building the most out-there custom fixie. Then once they actually start riding, they will see its hard work, get bored, then sell the bikes. Which of course we will buy back at a great price.

Viva La Revolution