The Lululemon Mansy

Sometimes I just can't let it go. Like a jammy old sweat sock in a yorkie terriors mouth, I can't shake it. I have been a proud cyclist for over two decades. Trends come and trends go. We all love them when they are fresh and we all lament their passing with words like ' that was always so gay...'. Neon bike fashions come to mind. Fixies. Its coming - you wait. One thing has always remained constant and that is triathlon season. Those who know me best know that I will attend the odd multisport event. Like a married couple at a swingers convention, I change my name to protect the guilty. The constant? Oh yah, a couple of times each summer, I rock that goddam red and neon yellow speedo all weekend long! Its getting a bit threadbare on the annil zone, but the banana hammock is sooo comfy now that the elastic bands have all broken in and no longer cut into my pudgy waist and groin. I will retire it one day, but I believe it has as many good days left as I have. When the pickle dish goes, I go! And that ain't today.

And then I see this. Crystal, the PIG and I are gorging on veggie curry buffet (Main and 49th), cruising through the Strait for a place for a pint and some tunes and WHAM! Like a grade 9 math teachers yard stick on my nap-time desk! There is my future sport tux! Those fashion gurus who have been mainlining the mainstream for years now have finally pinned me! How could they know? Shit-luck intuition I guess. But I love it! I will be the first to rock it. I will sleep on their doorstep to have one. If I am so unfortunate as to miss out on their limited quantities, I hear Wal-muck has 12 year old girls bathing suits on for $9.99. But thats plan B. And I'm not a plan B kinda guy. So it's the Mansy for me.